Wednesday, March 2, 2011


February 11, 2011
Where to start... It's Friday night and I'm tucked into my mosquito net for the night. I'm listening to some music, I just read a great devotion, and looked at the picture of me and Mitchell that acts as my bookmark. It made me realize once again how much I miss him. It's A LOT. I'm really missing my family a ton right now. My mom called me on Wednesday night and told me GG was not doing well at all and they didn't even know if she was going to make it through the night. My family flew out to Cali to say their goodbyes, I haven't heard anymore from them yet... And here I am, stuck in Peru. I can't do anything. This is the third family member that has died since I've been here... I haven't gotten "the call" yet but i have this feeling that it's coming all too soon... I just don't even know how to feel or how to grieve here... There is not a time or place. I mean, the other SM's have been/try to be supportive but it's just not the same. All I want to do is be with my family.. I miss them SSOOOO much. May first could not get here soon enough... My parents always tell me I'm strong and I can do it and I need to stay focused on my work here but it's so hard. I feel lost and helpless.. I can't really even find the right words to explain how I feel...

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